1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
FUCK WHALES
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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