is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Sorry about my life...
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
