Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
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