i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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