it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Randomize
