My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
