ADVERTISEMENT

• (732): View more from New Jersey

  feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out

  Fav 22 4947 1746

  share tweet
  

• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.

  Fav 30 6586 1436

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (702): View more from Nevada

  She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.

  Fav 9 4975 1079

  share tweet
  

• (586): View more from Michigan

  plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you

  Fav 13 3025 1493

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (602): View more from Arizona

  At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"

  Fav 4 4145 1209

  share tweet
  

• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer

  Fav 6 2651 1084

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (701): View more from North Dakota

  I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.

  Fav 4 1949 1075

  share tweet
  

• (815): View more from Illinois

  Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".

  Fav 3 2581 1146

  share tweet
  

• (775): View more from Nevada

  you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.

  Fav 6 1542 811

  share tweet
  
• 

  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (407): View more from Florida

  Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.

  Fav 13 2101 1069

  share tweet
  

• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame

  Fav 1 900 438

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (423): View more from Tennessee

  If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.

  Fav 1 564 401

  share tweet
  

• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form

  Fav 0 285 313

  share tweet
  

• (662): View more from Mississippi

  That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.

  Fav 0 84 110

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (620): View more from Kansas

  He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.

  Fav 1 120 14

  share tweet
  

Randomize