Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."