dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
