Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
