I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
