Whod you bang
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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