Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
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