yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize
