first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize