Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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