The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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