I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
