she looked like the bat from fern gully.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
