I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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