that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Randomize
