i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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