i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize