I didn't shave. On purpose
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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