omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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