what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
