yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
