I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
