so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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