dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
