NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
This house was built for laser tag.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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