oh god the rape fog is back!
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I wish you could order shots online.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
