I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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