no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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