if i died would you start the facebook group?
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
