me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
