No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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