I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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