after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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