I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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