Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
