Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
