I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
He's a Shit stain on my heart
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I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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