So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Randomize
