She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Randomize
