We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
