his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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