butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
