how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
