she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
