I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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